this post was submitted on 23 Dec 2023
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I would really rather that these were actual examples, and not conspiracy theories. We all have our own unsubstantiated ideas about what shadowy no-gooders are doing, but I'd rather hear about things that are actually happening.

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[โ€“] ArtieShaw@kbin.social 38 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Off the top of my head:

-Anything involving babies and incubators is immediately suspect. (Or babies and bayonets, for that matter).
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nayirah_testimony

-And this one is pure conspiracy, and I know it's not what you asked for... but it's ridiculous and 'tis the season. My mother in law is convinced that the lyrics to "Oh Christmas Tree" (O Tannenbaum) were changed by people who wanted to erase the true and original lyrics. By who? Big Tree financiers? Communists who are stealing Christmas and replacing it with trees?

Anyway...

The original lyrics, according to this conspiracy, praise God and never mention trees at all. It's completely ridiculous and always ends with the whole family singing along with the "true lyrics" from a badly photocopied paper that she hands out. I hope this doesn't come up again this year because it really makes me want to fight. Which would make me the bad person, because who initiates fights on Christmas? The next couple of days are going to be tough.

[โ€“] Maestro@kbin.social 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Now I'm really curious. Can you post those supposedly original lyrics?

[โ€“] ArtieShaw@kbin.social 0 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Sorry for the late response - I just got back from travelling to meet that side of the family. But unfortunately, I don't remember the lyrics. She introduced it a long time ago and she stopped being MC of Christmas a few years back. We didn't get to enjoy it this year.

I just made this up on the spot, but it was in this spirit

Oh God above, sweet lord of mine
How much you love your children.
Oh God above, sweet lord of mine
How much you love your children.

You sacrificed, your one true son
to save us earthbound sinners here...

--and so on --

Rejoice, repent! We praise your name...

[โ€“] Maestro@kbin.social 1 points 11 months ago

Oh man, that cringe-worthy. Thanks for the late reply!

[โ€“] Birdie@thelemmy.club 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Wait, the lyrics of a song with a title that literally translates to "Oh, Christmas tree" originally had absolutely nothing to do with trees?? I'd ask how she wraps her mind around that dichotomy, but I know people who believe in conspiracies do not need proof nor logic to believe.

Good luck. I'll be entertaining my Trumpster QMIL, so I'll be fighting along with you to control myself.

[โ€“] Classy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[โ€“] Birdie@thelemmy.club 4 points 11 months ago

Yep. She believes it all.

[โ€“] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Quasi, I guess if you're not actually married?

[โ€“] Evkob@lemmy.ca 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure Q here is referring to their mother-in-law's belief in the QAnon conspiracy.

[โ€“] feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

I just hoped for a better acronym.

[โ€“] SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

That's hilarious, since the sources on Wikipedia say that the original lyrics were about a tree, with no relation to Christmas.

[โ€“] IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

and many translated version never mention Christmas, like the Dutch and French versions.

[โ€“] Evkob@lemmy.ca 5 points 11 months ago

Minor correction: the French version (Mon beau sapin) definitely mentions Christmas. The line "Toi que Noรซl planta chez nous" appears twice, translating to "You (the tree) that Christmas planted in our home".

[โ€“] Piers@beehaw.org 2 points 11 months ago

I imagine either the "Oh God-mass God!" Version of the song either is the first version she learned whilst very young or she was taught this "fact" by someone who she trusts unquestioningly. It's very hard to convince people to reasses beliefs they've taken on in that way. Maybe you could give up that dream and work on gently leading her to a compromise of doing a verse of each?