this post was submitted on 03 Oct 2025
661 points (99.3% liked)

Not The Onion

18353 readers
1431 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 

The local Portland chapter of the World Naked Bike Ride group posted, "Emergency World Naked Bike Ride coming up in response to the militarization of our city. Plans are being worked on."

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] FerretyFever0@fedia.io 32 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Quck question, how uncomfortable is it to ride a bike while naked? Sounds pretty awful. Any accidental castrations?

[–] some_designer_dude@lemmy.world 60 points 1 week ago

If your balls hang low enough to be caught in the chain, you should always tape them up. Otherwise, just keep the seat lubed and it’s not a bad ride.

[–] ThePantser@sh.itjust.works 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] quick_snail@feddit.nl 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 week ago

Goddamn Loch Ness monster you ain't gettin no 3'50'' ballsack

[–] Peppycito@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You put underpants on the seat.

[–] MummifiedClient5000@feddit.dk 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

But how is it a naked bike ride if the bikes aren't naked?

Two words: penny-farthing pettycoats.