this post was submitted on 02 Oct 2025
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My dad was always conservative listening to Limbaugh and other talking heads as long as I can remember. He was always casually racist but then everything was ramped up in 2016. It grew to a point that he joined Facebook and every post was truly horrific. Gleefully enjoying violence. He was convinced Michelle Obama had to be a man. Every crude meme he could find he reposted.
It came to a head when I realized that I'm passively letting him say all of this, while at the same time I have mentors and people I care about that he actively wants harm to come to. It became a true moral thing, by letting him just say all of this, I felt like I was saying it was okay.
So I told him that he could either have these posts on facebook and his hate or he could have a relationship with me, but that I couldn't have a relationship with him while he had this much hatred towards people I care about.
That was the last time I spoke to him, he never reached out after that. It's been 7 years now since I've heard from him. He knows how to get hold of me if he should ever choose, but I've never heard anything from him.
From the rumors, 1 by 1 he alienated everyone else in the family, even coming to a screaming match with his elderly mother as she asked him to please be calm. Last I heard he picked up a new MAGA girlfriend and moved somewhere in the rust belt away from all the libs in the Midwest. I have no idea where beyond that.
I almost feel like it would easier if my parents would go full shitbag, then it would be easier to just not have relationships with them...my dad is a good dad otherwise, and my mom isn't bad, she kind of just acts like an angsty teenager. I want to have relationships with them, but I'm the full-on antifa super-solidier that Trump is trying to outlaw...the Venn diagram of things that are safe to talk about between us has a very small sliver in the middle...mostly, how's the weather?
Man, I feel you buddy. I really feel for you. My parents are middle of the road Democrats. They think they’re leftists but in reality they’re just Mitt Romney Bill Clinton types. and although they are not fascists, they are certain that positive change is just around the corner, none of this is too bad, the pendulum will swing back fully in the other direction in just a couple of years, just you wait.
They don’t seem to recognize that the pendulum has been dismantled and that the people in charge don’t give a shit on both sides. they get viscerally, angry, and upset when I try to point out to them that best case scenario America will take a generation to fix. And it’ll only get fixed if it’s filled with decent people, governed by decent people. And we all know that is not the case. So in reality, America will probably not get fixed in my lifetime. Maybe in my kids lifetime. My parents cannot understand that concept they think the good times are just around the corner.
I keep them at arms length I let them engage with my children and beyond that, it’s how’s the weather.
But I’ve also decided that because I don’t feel America can be fixed In a timeline, I find a reasonable as a relates to the raising of my children. I am leaving America.
i’ve already begun the process and my family and I will be moving near other family in a different country. Maybe my children will come back to these shores but aside from a few funerals I don’t think I’ll be back here.
good luck, buddy. We all need it.
Your parents are the prime example of what's wrong with Democrats and why America is probably fucked. MAGA/Fascists are the minority in our politics but the adage "The only thing necessary for evil to triumph in the world is that good men do nothing" rings true.
Yeah. Reagan fucked The US for the last 40 years, and Trump fucked us for the next 40. If I were in a position where I could reasonably move to Western Europe, I would...I guess I'll just have to live vicariously through you. You're doing the right thing by your kids, I'm rooting for you/them!
thank you, that means a lot. But don’t give up hope. There’s lots of nations in Western Europe that have programs that allow for immigration and permanent residency. There’s also programs to immigrate to Canada, depending on what type of work you’re in. And if all else fails, There’s good lives to be lived in South America and Central America. You’re not trapped. It may take you five or 10 years, but you can do it. Don’t let the empire crush you in its gears.
That's fair weather friend stuff. I won't be the good man who does nothing, the good man who runs away. If Evil triumphs, it will be despite me, not because of me.
A thousand times, yes.
I pity your dad. May he either turn back and no longer be a slave to fascism, or die as swiftly as possible.
There is no place in the world for fascism.