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How do you deal with the mortality of your parents? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 month ago by tetris11@lemmy.ml to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

I felt utterly alone and rudderless in the world

I think this encompasses it perfectly. That the world is lesser or harder somehow without.

But it would hit me out of the blue for years. I still dream about them sometimes.

Thanks for your perspective, and this is likely what I fear. It's weird to know that everyone goes through this at some point in their lives, this sudden feeling of losing the people that made you a child, and now you have to suddenly realise that there's no one to call upon other than yourself for adulthood

[–] Libra@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 month ago

Yeah, I've had a lot of medical problems in my life that make me more dependent upon others than most so I dunno if that means I felt it more keenly because of that or if that's just how it goes for everyone.

I will say, re:fear, that once you get past the initial wave of grief it's not really a bad thing, it's just remembering them and being sad that they're not there, and like anything it lessens with time. I wouldn't say I look forward to it or anything like that, but while for the first little bit it kind of wiped me out, now it's kind of like nostalgia. Instead of deeply feeling that freshly-severed connection it's more like fond remembrance now.