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turkey
Never had a national bird, according to this article. Thank God our infinitely wise and useful government got on that before they lost all their power to actually do anything meaningful or helpful. 🦅🇺🇸
It's what Franklin wanted. And Franklin had humor and consistent set of morals. And got France to back us up by having sex with so many French women.
I think the Turkey would be better than a bird we have to ADR in the screech of another animal.
Turkeys: invasive, will absolutely move in and fuck up your shit
Bald Eagle: almost went extinct because it ran out of a particular type of tree.
Turkeys: will eat literally anything under the sun. Grass. Seeds. Other, smaller inferior turkeys. Car bumpers.
Bald eagles: almost went extinct because salmon was in short supply.
Turkeys: big, fat, aggressive birds with absolutely no fucks to give. The Always Sunny crew if they were all birds and not just D.
Bald Eagles: sleek, reclusive, and quiet. Literally sounds like a mouse.
It's turkeys, it was always turkeys. It's not even close.
It was hunting (considered pests) and DDT (pesticide that made the eggshells break too easily) that made eagles almost go extinct.
Shhhhhhhhhhh. Their inability to make up bullshit on the Internet also nearly caused their extinction.
Unlike turkeys which as we all know are the driving force behind generative AI platforms. Obviously
Chicken nuggets