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What the hell is even "self care"? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) by dingus@lemmy.world to c/nostupidquestions@lemmy.ca

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I have been trying out various therapy services lately (they all suck and do nothing, but that's another topic). One of the things that the therapists always ask/say is if I do "self care" or tell me to do more "self care". They talk about all kinds of different things that range from eating right to eating something as a treat to exercising to going for a walk to finding a hobby to etc.

So it seems like "self care" is literally anything that benefits your existence. And I'm quite frankly confused. I live alone and have zero responsibilities outside of work. Isn't every moment of every day when I'm not working considered self care? When I go home at the end of the day, I have dinner and dick around on the internet. I don't have kids or pets so there's nothing else to worry about. I don't have any extra responsibilities. My continued existence is "self care". I don't get it.

What I would understand in all of this is if I had maybe like kids or a sick family member I had to take care of. Is that who "self care" is for? People that have extra responsibilities? Because for those of us loners, basically our entire existence is self care. So I'm confused at what any of that is supposed to accomplish. I already do everything for myself.

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[–] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago

Self care is pretty much what you make of it.

But the key is that it is something that makes life more bearable, improves your situation, and/or makes you relaxed/happy.

However, it isn't work related, it isn't something that you do because you're obligated (because it ends up being a stressor eventually, even when it's something otherwise beneficial), and it isn't things that are just pleasure seeking like smoking weed, even though it may well fit other criteria. That last is because chasing pleasure ends up causing as much trouble as help.

But, yeah, if you have minimal responsibilities, don't have much work stress, and you're fulfilled by how you spend your time, you don't really need the psychological types of self care, though you might need more physical self care like exercise.