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What did you do to survive the night of/after a breakup? (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 year ago by voidhearts@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

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Boyfriend of 2 years (best friend of 6) just told me he’s started seeing someone else. No discussion. Just ghosted me for a week and hit me with this news. Thought he was my soulmate, lmao. I feel like someone just ripped out my insides. Just turned 31 this year, this shit is not any easier than when I was a teenager.

How did you make it through that first night? The second? The third? Is it really just time? I feel like my body is too old to survive another heartbreak.

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[–] Eq0@literature.cafe 137 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My little piece of advice: you don’t have to think about the future, tomorrow, next week, they are all far off. Think about now, this hour, the next 5 minutes, or whatever stretch of time seems manageable. What do you do now? Cook dinner? Watch a show? Cry in the shower? The future might be scary and too much to manage now. You’ll handle it when you get to it. Now, you only have to think about right now.

Verbena tea is calming and soothing. Lavender is relaxing. Green tea for me is a calming ritual.

You got this. Maybe it doesn’t feel like it, but you only need to do one step, and you got that one step.

[–] voidhearts@lemm.ee 73 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Everyone here is so kind it’s making me cry even harder, lmao. Thank you. Thank you so much for your perspective, and for your encouragement. Your confidence in me makes me feel a lot stronger. my mind gets really caught up in what ifs and just general dread around the future when what I need to do is just be present in the now.

Just wish the right now wasn’t so lonely.

[–] Eq0@literature.cafe 3 points 1 year ago

It’s already a day later! You got this, the hardest part is flowing by. How are you doing?