this post was submitted on 30 Aug 2024
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[–] Mediocre_Bard@lemmy.world 58 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I was vegan for 8 years and during that time I didn't talk to anyone about it other than to say, "I don't eat that."

I say that to say this - vegans are insufferable and a large reason why I quit the community and went back to omnivore. Even after 8 years, other vegans were still 'more vegan' and would nitpick the dumbest stuff.

"Bro, did you eat a date? That killed a bee or something. Not cool."

Shut up with that. Let me eat my damn fruit.

I was healthier though. But, to be fair, I was younger.

[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 69 points 2 months ago (2 children)

"Bro, did you eat a date? That killed a bee or something. Not cool.”

I'm a level 5 vegan. I won't eat anything that casts a shadow.

[–] Gremour@lemmy.world 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Now it reminded me of Vladimir Sorokin's "Horse soup". Time to read it again.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Vladimir Sorokin’s “Horse soup”

https://www.bookrags.com/studyguide-horse-soup/#gsc.tab=0

(Reads blurb. What the actual fuck.)

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 months ago

I'm a level 2 proto-vegan, though it's functionally equivalent to a level 8 in normal terms I think.

Anyway, our food is cultivated in an open source orchard (the genomes are all fully sequenced) using plea bargains with the surrounding woodland, where we encourage feral animals to aerate and urinate on the soil and we sensually assist in the procreation of the plant reproduction taking a 1%-5% crop yield over what the flies do not touch.

[–] volvoxvsmarla@lemm.ee 16 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You know what, it's so much easier to say you're an omnivore and end up eating meat once a year than to say you are a vegan who makes an exception about once a year. The first label would earn you a "wait so you're basically vegan?!" vs "you're not vegan then and you're a dirty cheater".

[–] davepleasebehave@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

exactly. you choose your labels to best express your positions.