this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2024
25 points (96.3% liked)

Programmer Humor

37295 readers
16 users here now

Post funny things about programming here! (Or just rant about your favourite programming language.)

Rules:

founded 6 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Those who know, know.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] CodexArcanum@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago (5 children)

I should get to work on my opus, "Dirty Code"

Inside I'll reveal all my secrets like: not writing tests, not documenting anything, putting the whole app into a single python file, object-disoriented relational mapping, obscure SQL tricks, unobscure no-sql tricks, and more!

[–] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

object-disoriented

I'll steal this to shit talk about code; until git blame points to my past self

[–] Tlaloc_Temporal@lemmy.ca 0 points 11 months ago

Github, but it's afraid of commitment, it just wants to spoon.

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 4 points 11 months ago

Just make sure the first chapter is dedicated to spaghetti, and contains various GOTO statements telling where the reader where to go shove it and other obscenities.

[–] pfm@scribe.disroot.org 2 points 11 months ago

I hope your book won't have a table of context and those stupid indexes. If they read it, they should know where you mention topics, right? Tables of contents considered harmful! /s

[–] mesamunefire@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

I like "how to build APIs you won't hate".

[–] Tja@programming.dev 1 points 11 months ago

I hope the tricks are only supported on kafka's ksql.