this post was submitted on 05 Feb 2024
285 points (93.8% liked)

Not The Onion

12361 readers
282 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] Fungah@lemmy.world -2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

TIM YOU NEED TO GET THIS TRAIN BELOE 100 KPH OR I WONT BE ABLE TO VLOSE ITS AORTAL VALVE. FO YOU WANT THIS FUCKING TRAIN TO BLEED OUT, MAN? NOW YOU GO GRAB THAT FUCKING ENGINEER AND TELL THAT SON OF A BITCH UNLESS HE WANTS TO EXPLAIN TO THIS TRAIN'S WIFE AND TRAIN CHILDREN THAT HE MURDERED THE MOST IMPORTANT TRAIN IN THEIR TRAIN LIVES HE WILL SLOW. THIS. FUCKING. THING. DOWN. GO, TIM GO!

[–] nilloc@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 9 months ago

DAMNIT JIM, I’M AN ENGINEER, NOT A DOCTOR!