Jokes and Humor

[alt text: text that says, "The last thing you see when your parachute fails to open". Below the text is a photo of the lid of a spice jar. The lid is labeled: "GROUND CUMIN".]

[alt text: a tweet by @equine__dentist on twitter. The text of the tweet says, "working retail". Below the text is a screenshot from the videogame Lies of P, which shows the player fighting a boss called "White Lady" with a large health bar underneath her name.]

[alt text: text that says, "Christopher Columbus discovers the sidewalk, circa 2020, colorized". Below the text is a photo of a statue of Christopher Columbus, which has been knocked down by protesters moments before.]

[alt text: a photo of graffiti writing on a brick wall, which says, "Bitchstopher Colombitch".]

[alt text: a tweet by @LinkOfSunshine on twitter. The tweet says: "I love the idea that America developed a weather-controlling superweapon and the only thing they use it for is just to fuck over Florida specifically twice a year"]

[alt text: a tweet by @maxotunes on twitter. The tweet says, "in the shop straight up 'jorking it' and by 'it', haha, well. let's justr say." Below the text is a vibrant ad for a game called, "MAHJONGUS: Mystery of Fortescue".]

[alt text: a tweet by @jessokfine on twitter. The tweet says, "Every time I talk about milk, I clarify 'not breastmilk.' It's unnecessary and it makes people uncomfortable."]

[alt text: a photo of a dog playing with bubbles in a yard. There is a bubble directly in front of the dog, which makes it look like the dog is trapped inside of the bubble.

[alt text: a watercolor-style painting of a frog on a black background. The frog has a speech bubble, which says, "You are not alone in this abyssal darkness. I am here, and we shall face the WEDNESDAY as DUDES."]

[alt text: text that says, "This is what happens when we drain pumpkins of their spice. Think twice before you order that latte." Below the text is an image of a hand holding a shrunken, dessicated, and moldy pumpkin, which may have had a face carved into it when it was fresh.]

[Image description: text which says "You're a 10 but it's on the pH scale". Underneath is a picture of a woman whose face suggests she is dropping hard truths. OP has since learned that this is a character from a show saying "You're basic" and that the post is accidentally self-referential]

[alt text: a 4-panel comic by @ttonyesp. The first panel shows a woman peaking out from an apartment kitchen and saying, "Love, where's the trash can?" The second panel shows a man sitting on a couch and replying, "Under the sink." The third panel shows the same man looking confused, and saying, "Wait, I'm not married." The fourth and final panel shows the man unmasking the woman while saying, "A, HA!", to reveal that the woman was a raccoon in a human suit. It appears that the raccoon was in the process of digging through the trash can before being unmasked.]

[alt text: two frames from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. The first frame shows the gang looking at Dennis and saying, "So you lied to us, Dennis?". In the second frame, Dennis is replying, "The rules were, you guys were not gonna fact-check me."]

[alt text: a photo of a man sitting on a couch with a kitten on his chest. The man's shirt has an illustration of a crocodile which is facing the kitten, and the kitten appears to be staring at the crocodile and screaming in terror.]

[alt text: a painting of a person's head in profile. The head has a slight cutaway, to reveal that the person has a dragon-gremlin sort of creature living inside of their head. There is text labeling the person as "Me" and labeling the creature as "The thing that makes me post weird shit online".]

[a three-panel comic by Tom Gauld for New Scientist. The top border of the comic shows a two-dimensional, side view pattern of different cars lined up in traffic. The first panel panel shows two people talking. Person A is holding a book and saying, "It's hard to get excited about these new electric vehicles when I've seen much more ambitious possibilities in fiction." Person B is replying, "Sci-fi fan, huh?". In the second panel, Person A is looking at their book and going, "uhhh...yeah. Sci-fi." The third and final panel reveals that Person A is reading a book from the Busytown series, and it depicts a mouse driving a pickle-shaped car, a worm driving an apple-shaped car, and a pig driving a hotdog-shaped car.]

[alt text: an edited photo of a hibachi chef frying rice on a teppan grill. The photo has been edited so that the chef's head is replaced by the head of a shrimp, and the chef's arms have each been replaced with the tail of a shrimp. There is a snapchat-style caption on the photo that says, "dude no fucking way".]

[alt text: an edited screenshot of an old internet ad. The left half of the ad depicts a middle-aged woman wearing an orange Nike headband and holding a basketball under her arm. The right half of the ad has text, which says, "MY HUSBAND IS DEAD. I don't want to remarry. I only want to play ball. Shoot hoops with local milfs NOW!!! CLICK HERE".]

[alt text: a screenshot from an app for an airline service, which appears to be showing part of an airliner seating chart. There is a pop-up that says, "Ready to eject Lynda? This action cannot be undone. Flight attendants will eject Lynda from the plane mid-flight. Don't worry, your arrival time will not be impacted." The pop-up has a large blue button that says, "Eject Lynda - $2,703.50". Fine print text below the button says, "Lynda will be able to counter your ejection bid. View Terms"