this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2025
707 points (98.9% liked)

People Twitter

8369 readers
1838 users here now

People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.

RULES:

  1. Mark NSFW content.
  2. No doxxing people.
  3. Must be a pic of the tweet or similar. No direct links to the tweet.
  4. No bullying or international politcs
  5. Be excellent to each other.
  6. Provide an archived link to the tweet (or similar) being shown if it's a major figure or a politician. Archive.is the best way.

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 5 points 5 days ago

Well I know what I'm doing this weekend

[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago

🎢 If you like then you should've put an easily removable ring on it 🎢

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 99 points 1 week ago (6 children)

You know, I’ve spent a long time bemoaning my asexuality and sex-repulsedness, what I’d be missing out on that I can’t bring myself to do.

Then I realized that this experience is completely out of the cards for me, and cannot happen.

I think I’m at peace with myself and the world now.

[–] markovs_gun@lemmy.world 13 points 6 days ago

I will say that this is not a typical expression of sexuality. I have never once thought that I needed to put a cock ring on, let alone one made of motherfucking titanium.

[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 92 points 1 week ago

Here friend.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 56 points 1 week ago (7 children)

Here's another one that might help you out:

Warning ⚠️ ⚠️⚠️: fucking disturbing, full dead dove situation here.

Back in the wild west days of the internets, a friend of mine discovered a forum for sounding. He decided he wanted to try it, and read some of the threads on the forum. What he neglected to do was to read any of the threads about beginners and safety. He just read a few things about what people were into, and then hopped directly online and ordered some stuff. remember, wild west of the internet era here. So, fast forward a while and he gets the packages delivered. He goes to his bedroom and he tries it out.

He decided to start with a very small/thin rod, as he assumed that was best. What he got was a hard metal rod with no rounded tip and a little control box for electrical stimulation. He does what he does, and then turns on the electrics. At first, he's enjoying it. Then he cranks that bitch up to 11, because he's a teenaged idiot. He immediately spasms, jerking forward, and the sounding rod pokes/pierces him inside. He says it pierces his prostate, but when I googled it it seems more likely it was his urethral wall. Either way. He is now punctured, being zapped on his insides, naked, with an erection, and has fallen onto his bedroom floor. He is obviously making quite a bit of noise.

His mother bursts in the room in a panic, and sees her son laying on the floor, with an erection, and wires coming out of his dick, in obvious pain. This is the part of the story I should probably mention that his mom is one of those Uber Christian black church ladies. You know the easter hat church ladies? That's a normal Sunday for her. Every week, twice a week, she is at church in her finest finery.

But, in the moment, she's in mom mode, and only wants to help her baby. So she grabs hold of the wires that are attacking her child's innards, and forcibly yoinks them out of her son.

At which point he ejaculates. In front of his mother. And then drives him to the hospital.

I only found out about this story 10 years or so after it happened, many, many after we had moved away from each other. I've had dinner with his mom. I've slept over at their house, and he at mine. I cannot imagine the all out lecture he got once she found out he wasn't going to die. OMG

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 23 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Self, he explicitly warned you. And you took his advice for like five minutes and didn't read it.

Goddammit, Tanis.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I did explicitly warn you. I'm very sorry you failed to heed the warning lol

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I heeded it for three hundred--count'em--three hundred seconds, thank you very much.

Then I just had to make sure the dick tazer tasted like pain, I guess.

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 2 points 6 days ago

I mean, honestly? Good job. Lol. I never heed the warnings at all. I regret it sometimes, most of the time I can just brush it off. The only one to ever truly hurt me, though, was that damn my little pony thing on reddit, and a similar one with a shoe box

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

a friend of mine

So does your dick work nowadays or not?

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 11 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I swear to God this wasn't me. I'm not shy about sharing my fucked up sex stories. Lol. I'll gladly regale you with the time I first bottomed, or when I nearly went to ER because of those damn metal balls lol

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I believe you, just reminded me of a SWIM says

[–] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Not familiar with what a SWIM says is?

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 4 points 5 days ago

Someone who isn't me, during the earlier times on the net people would post on drug forums and almost all of them would start with the plausible deniability that "swim says" etc.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] blockheadjt@sh.itjust.works 44 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It is possible to have enough brains to know not to do this, even with sexual desires

[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 35 points 1 week ago (3 children)

"Men have a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time" - Robin Williams

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you're looking for more justification, then you've got online access to unlimited information about unusual sexual practices, injuries and experiences gone wrong. Depends on how deep you want to dive into this......but there's a lot out there if you need more material to make yourself feel better.

Also, I didn't know asexuals bemoaned their asexuality. Sucks to have a sexual preference that doesnt align with what you want to be.

[–] tanisnikana@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago (8 children)

I mean, I'm sitting here, not really having sex, when about 30% of all popular music is about the horizontal monster mash. So many television plots are born of β€œI need to have sex with this person badly but it will destroy my marriage.” The sheer amount of porn on the internet, and how it’s the number one consumed genre of entertainment and it’s not even close.

All this taken together, it’s enough to bemoan the fact that I’m disgusted even by the thought of it, and millions of other people have made art about it for billions to consume. What the hell am I missing, that it’s this popular?

This is, at some point, something most sex-repulsed people have to work through.

load more comments (8 replies)
[–] OmegaMan@lemmings.world 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

If you were actually asexual I doubt you'd be moaning.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 91 points 1 week ago (6 children)

I've worked at 4 different fire departments. We don't own diamond saws. They gonna stick a needle in you and pull the blood out.

[–] BanMe@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

My SO worked overnights in an ER. Someone came in with a tight ankle monitoring cuff, which apparently has titanium cables inside, and their foot wound up swelling up because of an accident that damaged the cuff. He was hours from losing his foot entirely, they had to operate but the cuff was in the way. They managed to wake up someone at the manufacturer at 1am, who then located a jeweler back in our city with saws that could cut it, and emailed over diagrams showing exactly where to cut. The fire department, indeed, came and went unable to do anything because it was too close to the skin to use any of their grinders.

Yeah. We carry a lot of shit, but generally a small Dremel with diamond cutting blades isn't one of them.

[–] Evotech@lemmy.world 30 points 1 week ago

Seems a lot easier and safer anyway!

[–] Bosht@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yeah this was where my brain travelled logically. Pretty easy to just drain the blood. Worst case scenario they don't put you under, but doubt that's the least of your concerns in this scenario.

[–] finitebanjo@piefed.world 10 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

My first thought was ice bags on the front and in the back. Emphasis on in.

[–] Bosht@lemmy.world 4 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Well I think part of the issue is the blood is able to travel in when getting an erection, but then is restricted and unable to come back out. So icing wouldn't do much except numb the area.

[–] finitebanjo@piefed.world 2 points 6 days ago

I just can't imagine the blood being entirely blocked by an exterior ring even when the pressure difference favors flow back into the body so heavily. Maybe if medication were involved that prevented flaccidity.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

i don't want to do the math of the coefficient of expansion for both titanium and stainless steel rings and an erect penis and find out whether it's better to freeze or heat it off, but if research hasn't been done i bet it'd make for an ignoble

[–] IsoKiero@sopuli.xyz 2 points 5 days ago

I didn't do the math either, but based on personal experience with a penis and different metals (not this kind of tho) the penis changes size a lot more than any ring. And not because of temperature changes.

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Regna@lemmy.world 37 points 1 week ago

Buy rings that have at least two, preferably three break points. Love titanium, have had to break it off a finger (thankfully nut free)after a motorcycle accident, glad I sprung for the option with three break points.

[–] kandoh@reddthat.com 28 points 1 week ago

Silicon dick rings works just fine let me tell you.

[–] TheReturnOfPEB@reddthat.com 24 points 1 week ago

More than just the tip. The whole package goes in there ... the beans and the frank.

[–] Pencilnoob@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Yeeeaaaaa don't like that. Thankfully I've never been on that kind of call, I would not want to be the guy operating that saw

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Would you rather be the guy getting operated on?

[–] medgremlin@midwest.social 11 points 1 week ago (3 children)

The last time I saw this in the ER as a medical student I had to teach the fireman how to cut with the diamond dremel correctly. I never really expected my metalworking and blacksmithing hobby to be particularly useful in emergency medicine.

It did take 3 hours to get the damn thing off because we had to make 2 cuts to get it open.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world 17 points 1 week ago (2 children)

What if my goal is for the firefighters to see my cock?

[–] massive_bereavement@fedia.io 19 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Have you tried asking first?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] village604@adultswim.fan 14 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Do they mean tungsten? Because titanium is a relatively soft metal, with the alloys used for jewelry being like 20-40 on the Rockwell C scale.

Mild steel is about in the same range.

[–] HikingVet@lemmy.ca 10 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

And other titanium alloys used in tooling or knives can be harder than W2 tool steel. IIRC nickel is a common metal it's alloyed with and nickel is a bitch.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Oof, I wear one on my finger. Never thought of this... Though, fingers don't swell up as much as what they are referring to lol.

[–] Gumus@lemmy.world 12 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I wear a tungsten ring, which is nigh indestructible. Once I got stung by a wasp between my fingers. I instinctively took the ring off immediately. A few seconds later my fingers swelled like crazy. I think I might've lost the finger if I didn't take the ring off in time.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 6 points 6 days ago

Tungsten is brittle though, so at least it can be removed fairly easily. Locking pliers if you want to do it reasonably safely.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: next β€Ί