Look at the world around you. What's the argument for not turning into a crab?
this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2025
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Ocean acidification :(
oh, right.
Crabs don’t have to deal with back pain so I’ll grant them that.
As far as we know
There's a study for you:
Crabby Back: An Exploratory Investigation of Perceived Dorsal Pain in Crustaceans
Just look at the world around you
Right here on the ocean floor
Such wonderful things surround you
What more is you lookin' for?
Doot do do doot do do do doot do… 🎶🦀🧜♀️
There are things that regularly try and succeed in eating them.
Ok and? How does that differ from my girlfriends
Do they give back the parts they took?
They don't ordinarily keep my parts, so yea
Under the sea
My DNA is so ready to carcinify.
I always get the urge to yell “SPONGEBOY, ME BOB”
My current job involves holding tongs regularly
Let me guess:
QC at a tong factory?
click-clamp
Shit.
click-clomp
Damnit... these are bad.
I'm not a Pan-Crustacean, I refuse carcinisation! I shall reach my final form as a proud mammal who eats Pan-Crustaceans for breakfast! Behold!
(Context)
Crab people Crab people
Taste like crab, talk like people
From Wiktionary: The convergent evolution of decapod crustaceans from forms dissimilar to true crabs into similar forms.
My dog knows it's time to go outside when I clack the tongs.
Burger time
So much of the kid pidgin. Reading that makes my head hurt.