this post was submitted on 06 May 2025
295 points (96.2% liked)

Not The Onion

16157 readers
1455 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
all 49 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 55 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Say what you will about Pope Francis but he seemed to genuinely care about others.

[–] garbagebagel@lemmy.world 30 points 2 days ago (3 children)

It's odd, it's almost like that's the way Catholics are supposed to be.

[–] futatorius@lemm.ee 9 points 2 days ago

No wonder the rightwing US archbishops and cardinals hated him.

[–] XTL@sopuli.xyz 17 points 2 days ago

The very start of his time looked really good. Especially in contrast to Pope Palpatine before. Later, a bit more confused.

[–] possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 2 points 2 days ago

Some are

There are also the ones who are far right and don't seem to actually can about helping people. Those are the people who make me sick.

[–] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 96 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Not really not the onion though. The Pope was apparently calling priests in Gaza almost every day. He believed parking the Popemobile in front of hospitals and children's clinics would make for really bad optics if (who am I kidding, when) Israel bombs them.

[–] cj2127@lemm.ee 55 points 3 days ago (1 children)

He was right though, it would look terrible when Israel bombs them.

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 40 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Yesterday Israel used a bomb for a gender reveal. They don't care if they look bad.

[–] cj2127@lemm.ee 19 points 3 days ago
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world -4 points 2 days ago

I'm not defending Israel or the folk who did that, just saying that some idiot in southern California did that in the last decade too. Started a big fire. I recall we mocked them in public discourse because we had little other way of venting our frustration that a public employee would burn down an appreciable portion of the state to announce what gender they think their child has.

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee -2 points 3 days ago (2 children)

No, they made jokes about how it looked like a gender reveal.

Fucking Al Jazeera.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 16 points 2 days ago

Username does not check out

[–] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This isn't the comeback you think it is.

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It's not a comeback, it's setting the record straight. Repeating false accusations doesn't help anyone.

[–] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They changed the headline on their news story from one to the other.

[–] wildbus8979@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

They changed the headline to "jokes about" because you can't prove initial intent. It hardly changes anything.

Again, this isn't the comeback you think it is. Stop dumping for genocidal maniacs.

[–] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 1 points 1 day ago

Blowing up a building for fun and making slightly off colour jokes aren't even close to the same thing.

There's enough accurate information to make Israel look bad, stop making shit up.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 13 points 2 days ago

My first thought is that seeing a popemobile outside a hospital would cause members of the idf some pause, but I've been watching this conflict for almost a century and some 18 year olds would consider it a high score.

[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago

Sheesh, imagine being that priest, doing daily status updates skipping about 23 levels of chain of command.

This Pope had a personal charity underling who would walk the streets of Rome and hand out cash to people who needed it. The money came from selling autographed indulgences. So I'm not surprised in the least.

[–] NotSteve_@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 days ago

The Popemobile was Hamas

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 3 points 2 days ago

There are other articles here that don't really read as satire ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[–] riverSpirit@thelemmy.club 53 points 2 days ago (3 children)

The Pope wanting the Catholic Church to touch children one last time.

[–] futatorius@lemm.ee 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That'd more likely be Ratzinger's thing.

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Yeah, Francis might have done nothing about the problem but he didn't seem to support it like the previous pope Joseph Ratzinger who was pope from 2005 to 2013 when he renounced the papacy, the first pope to do so of their own initiative in over seven hundred years.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 11 points 2 days ago

I wish I can gold this

Wonder how long until Israel bombs the Popemobile

[–] xc2215x@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

A good usage of the vehicle.

[–] absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz 12 points 2 days ago

Well at least it is bullet proof....not sure about missile strike proof though.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That cars about to be bombed. I hope they have a spare.

[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I heard at one point that they have at least one on every continent except Antarctica.

[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Discriminating against penguins again?

[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

Penguins are definitely protestants.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 4 points 2 days ago

That would make a lot of sense.

[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

Makes sense, the cardinals probably view it as a failure because they desperately tried to stop people from calling it the Popemobile.

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Is that an el camino? WTF is that.

[–] Flax_vert@feddit.uk 8 points 2 days ago
[–] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They are usually Mercedes vehicles

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago (3 children)

Doesn't Italy have a ton of car manufacturers? It keeps getting stranger.

[–] 100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yes, but most of them suck and I don't see the Pope using a Ferrari

[–] Cocodapuf@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Yeah, that's also not great optics...

[–] futatorius@lemm.ee 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The Vatican is not part of Italy.

[–] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 days ago

If you want to think that, that's fine. Yes, they're their own nation, but they're linked.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 0 points 2 days ago

You didn't know what the popemobile is? Wha

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Just as soon as that dude power washes the Pope stank out. Then they can load it up with fresh, young, traumatized boys.

[–] riverSpirit@thelemmy.club 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

We all know that things seen many young traumatized boys.