this post was submitted on 27 Apr 2025
592 points (98.7% liked)

Not The Onion

16004 readers
1549 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 47 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] yarr@feddit.nl 11 points 3 hours ago

This is horrible. Does anyone have the locations of the eggs so I can safely recover them to make sure no one else smokes those dank nuggs?

[–] dechnically@sh.itjust.works 15 points 4 hours ago

free my boy he did nothing wrong

[–] jagged_circle@feddit.nl 16 points 5 hours ago

Why are the police looking for him?

Dont they have better things to do than give people awards or sth?

[–] wheeldawg@sh.itjust.works 3 points 3 hours ago

Great, this will just stir up the "omg Halloween candy has razor blades in it" crowd.

[–] DogOnKeyboard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 6 hours ago
[–] The_Caretaker@lemm.ee 5 points 6 hours ago

Real eggs are expensive.

[–] dotson@sh.itjust.works 24 points 13 hours ago

the weedster bunny

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 84 points 17 hours ago
[–] thejoker954@lemmy.world 168 points 19 hours ago (1 children)
[–] NatakuNox@lemmy.world 27 points 15 hours ago

He's like a Scooby-Doo villain but for good? He would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for those pesky cops.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 149 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

And one, packed with concentrates, labeled "He is resin!"

[–] blindbunny@lemmy.ml 15 points 18 hours ago

Is there a pic of this? I wanna put John Brown's face on it.

[–] arotrios@lemmy.world 87 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

The hero we wanted, but didn't deserve

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 80 points 19 hours ago

The Easter Buddy.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 56 points 18 hours ago (2 children)

In true Easter Egg Hunt fashion, one egg was not recovered until someone's grandchild randomly found it a day later.

[–] can@sh.itjust.works 28 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

Thought you were joking

"The suspect posted four photos on Facebook showing each location as hints to locate the eggs," the release said. "He also posted a photo of five plastic eggs in the seat of a vehicle. Officers found four eggs and believed he had not placed the fifth."

Officers learned they were incorrect in their assumption when a man and his granddaughter turned the final egg into the department the next day, having also found it in a park, per the release. In total, officers said they recovered over a quarter of an ounce of marijuana

[–] andros_rex@lemmy.world 5 points 6 hours ago (3 children)

over a quarter of an ounce of marijuana

So like $100-200 worth of weed? Unless it was like shake or something.

[–] ayyy@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

In Northern California you can get a crappy ounce for $50, a good one for $100

thank you for the economics lesson i was gettin ready

[–] Confused_Emus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 4 hours ago

Much less than that. I get an ounce for $100 from my dealer. And he’s competing with dispensaries, so it’s not shake, either.

[–] Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 4 hours ago

A quarter oz is $40-$70 at dispensaries in my area (medical legal state)

[–] JeeBaiChow@lemmy.world 11 points 14 hours ago

Paint greased pigs with the numbers 1,2 and 4. Release said pigs. Watch the hilarity ensue.

[–] lemmy12369@midwest.social 10 points 15 hours ago

In my city a guy tapes money to an object randomly in some random neighborhood

[–] turtlesareneat@discuss.online 15 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Unscrupulous, no regard for the law in creatively hocking a product, give this man an MBA

[–] jasoman@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

Real political material

[–] PacMan@sh.itjust.works 11 points 18 hours ago

The weed fairy is real!

On-on

[–] bizzle@lemmy.world 9 points 17 hours ago

That's Chad shit

[–] phoenixarise@lemmy.world 10 points 18 hours ago

How generous! Too bad I wasn’t there lol

[–] buwho@lemmy.ml 11 points 18 hours ago

not all hero's wear capes

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 9 points 18 hours ago

Guy was so high he planned it all in detail, then told everyone .... then later realized he hadn't done anything.

[–] Maeve@kbin.earth 5 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

That is the worst URL I've seen in a really long time. Story was funny though.

[–] puppycat@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 17 hours ago

local news: easter egg marijuana scavenger hunt hints online eggs weed pot facebook social media hint picture pictures hid hidden police search investigation five drug drugs narcotics dealer selling sell park parks city around across

[–] leaky_shower_thought@feddit.nl 2 points 17 hours ago

yoshi's time to shine