Apple

I, too, have abandoned Samsung.

Not going over to iPhone, though, screw that noise. The one time I tried it was on an iPad and yeah, no, screw most of that UX. Plus I'm not giving Apple money. I'm on an Android phone with a 3.5mm jack and a SD card slot, like nature intended.

I got a 15 pro this year. This is my first apple phone.

I agree with your Android "struggle" list completely and would add that every single model I ever owned (especially the Google phones) had some unbelievable hardware issue that made using the phone a maddening experience. From calling that wouldn't work at all to black screen on wakeup that wouldn't go away, every time I bought a new phone it felt like the timer had begun on finding what new exciting awful hardware bug was going to present itself and whether Google would warranty replace it.

I agree with most of your iphone revelation comments. Face ID is miles better than anything I ever experienced on Android. Look and feel is definitely better. The audio switching is as easy as it gets. Carplay is... fine. I don't like the work flow better and some of the decisions are weird when moving from app to app within apps, but I'm used to them now and don't see them as often.

What I disagree about:

• Shortcuts is a shadow of what I could do with Tasker. It's like eating baby food after having a Michelin rated meal. It's fine. It's not the end of the world and Shortcuts covers the use cases of most things, but man it was jarring to see what it couldn't do when compared to Tasker.
• Apple Maps sucks and boy I've tried.
• Comparing emulation is crazy talk. There's a billion emulators available on Android and Apple doesn't have what Android had a decade ago.

What I like about apple that you didn't mention:

• Integration of apple stuff: it all works out of the box as you'd expect. This wasn't always the case with Android and having it all just work is pretty great.
• Apple stores are cool for getting stuff fixed quick. Kid broke their screen and we had it swapped in an hour. No calling around to see if my local shops had my Android phone screen in stock.

What I hate about apple that you didn't mention:

• No custom launchers. I HATE IT I HATE IT I HATE IT. I can't believe people put up with this shit.
• Apple people and their obsession with text messaging using the Messages app. My god, texting has always sucked and apple people still use it.
• I miss Fdroid every single day. Sometimes I don't need a super slick app with a subscription for some simple thing. I just need a little app that does a little thing.
• EVERY APP IS A SUBSCRIPTION FOR GOD'S SAKE EVERY SINGLE DAMN ONE

Few months ago I switched to an iPhone 15 Pro Max after being on Android for years. I think I briefly tried an iPhone 6s back in the day? For maybe a month and gave up. I only switched because I happened to be able to get the phone without having to pay anything down, and the one good thing I've always heard about iPhone is the camera. Going to be honest, I despise iOS as much as I remember. Navigating around is a nightmare. The number of times I try to use the android back gesture, only for nothing to happen, is in the dozens of times per day. The fact that there is no dedicated back button or gesture, unless a specific app graciously decides you get to have one(in the most inconvenient location possible), is obscene. Back on Android, not only do I get said feature, I can tweak and customize it to my liking. And for that matter, I can do the same to pretty much the entire UI. The nearly non-customizable UI on iOS is infuriating. The fact that I can't seem to predict which volume is about to be adjusted when I hit the volume buttons is even more infuriating. As is the phone's insistence on not switching audio devices when it should. Or refusing to connect to Bluetooth headphones or other devices automatically, constantly forcing me to going into the settings and do it manually. And just countless other things I absolutely hate about this thing. The only thing I have found to be an improvement is the battery life, which after a full day is still at 90% when I am ready to go to bed. But that's only because I just don't touch the phone anymore. I check an email or two during the day, and the phone otherwise just sits in my pocket untouched. Switching to an iPhone is probably the single biggest technology-related mistake I've made in years. And that's coming from someone who is running Arch as the only OS on my gaming laptop, and owns multiple VR headset and AR/XR glasses.

I'm glad other people seem to like their iPhones, but I absolutely despise this thing, and oh my god am I desperate to get the hell back onto Android at the first opportunity. I got this through Boost Infinite, so I'm hoping that when it's time, they'll let me "upgrade" to the Galaxy S24 Ultra. Which is the phone I wanted to begin with, but they were conveniently only advertising the iPhone at the time, so I didn't know they had other phones.

Moral of the the story is, if you tend to do any customization at all when you get a new Android phone, you're probably going to hate iPhone. If you tend to just log in your email account and use the phone as it comes, you might fare better. In either case, do what you have to, to get your hands on a borrowed iPhone and spend some time with it before even considering making the switch.

file manager ruins any apple experience

I kinda wish ios had a fdroid equivalent. Apples $99 yearly dev fee basically forces apps to rely on subscriptions or advertising (rarely one time iap).

These look like all Samsung issues and not Android issues

I continue to be baffled that "anyone can grab your phone, point it at your face, and have access to everything" is somehow a feature and not a critical vulnerability. In the US, you can be compelled to unlock a device using biometrics, but not a password, under the 5th Amendment.