this post was submitted on 10 May 2024
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Asklemmy

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If your job was to come up with greater enshittification for society, what would you do?

My ideas:

  1. Rental apartments where every wall has a screen with ads 24/7. You can pay cheaper rent to live with ads in every wall or you can pay a monthly subscription to turn off the ads (you don't get to use the screens for anything else tho). After people get used to it we can start adding a little bit of ads even for the subscription users, just a little less.

  2. Movie theaters. This one is obvious, why did anyone think it was ok to give people access to uninterrupted movies just because they paid a couple bucks? We should include some ads in the middle of movies in the cinema duh.

  3. Water and electricity. Private utility providers should be able to require you to watch a certain amount of ads on their apps in order to deliver their services to you every month (you still also pay normally ofc).

  4. Alarm clocks. Smartphones should delete the option to pick a custom sound for alarm and instead wake you up with loud ads. Installing any custom alarm app should require root and we should lobby government to ban devices with alarm clocks which are not smart.

  5. Unified ad-watching score. Similar to credit score, you will gain points by not skipping ads, having the selfie camera turned on while watching an ad (to make sure you looking), having the microphone on to make sure it isn't muted, etc. Every platform contributes to your score. They can use your ad-watching score to give you benefits or punish you as they please.

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[โ€“] bstix@feddit.dk 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Escalator commercial break. Stops the escalator until the ad is done.

[โ€“] KittenBiscuits@lemm.ee 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"this escalator is temporarily stairs. You're welcome." -Mitch Hedberg

The real one to worry about is stopping the elevator for an ad break. You're trapped now bitches!

[โ€“] GreatDong3000@lemm.ee 1 points 6 months ago

One ad break between each floor or pay for direct lift that is a killer idea.

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[โ€“] AlexanderESmith@kbin.social 4 points 6 months ago

Nice try EA, but you're not getting my golden ideas for free.

[โ€“] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 4 points 6 months ago

Put ads for Twinkies on your can of Coke.

[โ€“] Mr_Fish@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago

Why do we need custom backgrounds for our phones and computers? That's free space that could be ads. Especially good if clicking/tapping on the background causes a full screen, unclosable, unskippable ad. Because a misclick is definitely showing interest in the product.

Browser load times. Slow that down a bit, and you've got enough time to pop an ad in between every page load.

[โ€“] RandomVideos@programming.dev 4 points 6 months ago

Having to interact with the ad for a set amount of time(opening the site promoted) to be able to continue using the app

Having to buy a minimum amount of promoted products would be extra evil

[โ€“] crozilla@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Every marketing executive: (taking notes)

[โ€“] Railing5132@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago

Are you kidding? OP is getting us to write their Master's thesis in Marketing right now!

[โ€“] Donebrach@lemmy.world 4 points 6 months ago

Quit crowdsourcing your goddamn school assignments.

[โ€“] inspxtr@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Lol ads that can be engineered into DNA, so that they can be passed down for generations.

[โ€“] FireWire400@lemmy.world 1 points 6 months ago

I bet someone will find a way to do that with CRISPR CAS-9...

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[โ€“] dmegatool@lemmy.ca 3 points 6 months ago

This guy ads

[โ€“] Ibaudia@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

If any of these become a reality I am fully prepared and willing to commit acts of-

[removed by moderator]

[โ€“] HipsterTenZero@dormi.zone 3 points 6 months ago

Clothing with patches sewn into the interior in the shape of the brand you're trying to sell. Like braille ads, but for your clothes.

[โ€“] Havald@lemmy.world 3 points 6 months ago

Ads etched into glasses. Maybe tiny screens if that's possible.

[โ€“] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 3 points 6 months ago

When people start to live in space, we can ration oxygen to the occupants, force them to view ads to live or pay for subscriptiom

Michael Scott No no No. no NO dot meme

[โ€“] Zagorath@aussie.zone 2 points 6 months ago

2 is already a thing. Product placement.

[โ€“] lazylion_ca@lemmy.ca 2 points 6 months ago

Cineplex movie theaters in Canada have ads in the app you use to watch trailers and buy tickets.

[โ€“] Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Per-swipe ads on phones. Free tier: every 5 swipes, regardless of app, full screen unskippable ads (content saved to devices locally so airplane mode doesn't stop it). Then you pay more to increase the number of swipes you get between ads.

[โ€“] GreatDong3000@lemm.ee 1 points 6 months ago

Great idea. We can also set a timer for the wifi on your phone to be disconnected automatically and you have to watch an ad before the time runs out to postphone it.

[โ€“] A_Chilean_Cyborg@feddit.cl 2 points 6 months ago

Regulatory bodies, save us!

[โ€“] dutchkimble@lemy.lol 2 points 6 months ago (1 children)

The movie thing happens in India since ages ago, they call it intervals. Tons of ads before a movie starts and during the interval. Nice for a pee break and to buy snacks, but they obviously overdo it, movies never start on time, and the whole experience is shitty.

[โ€“] mudeth@lemmy.ca 3 points 6 months ago

For some context, it's because Indian movies were conventionally much longer in length (2.5 to 3 hours). Movies are written to have a cliffhanger at the interval, so much so that it's sometimes referred to as a meta joke.

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