this post was submitted on 23 Jan 2024
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Is there a word that means "a hatred of gay people", rather than "a fear of or aversion to gay people"? Surely there are people who simply hate homosexuality without necessarily fearing it, and vice versa. Someone who hates homosexuality should probably be condemned for their unreasonable and hateful prejudices, but should someone who actually fears homosexuality but without hating it be condemned in the same way? Why isn't there a distinction?

And similarly, why do we have words like "arachnophobia" which means a fear of something (not necessarily a hatred of it; though you might hate what you fear, that isn't necessarily always the case, nor is the opposite always true either (fearing what you hate)), but "homophobia" is used to mean "hatred of homosexuality" rather than a genuine fear of it without necessarily hating it?

It makes me feel a bit sorry (as much as one can) for people who might genuinely be afraid of the idea of homosexuality, maybe even struggling with their own sexuality or possibly in denial of being homosexual themself, but without hating it at all (even possibly being supportive of it), not having a word that conveys a fear of the concept/phenomenon without any kind of disdain for it, since "homophobia" would generally be interpreted to mean something far more negative. Usually when someone has a phobia for something, we support them to deal with it in a non-accusatory way, but in this case, well, I guess there isn't even a word for that kind of phobia if it's actually a phobia in the usual sense.

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[–] Evkob@lemmy.ca 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

"I'd be a bigot at the first sign of someone being mean to me" is an interesting argument to make.

BTW, maybe avoiding the use of "gay mafia" to refer to the queer community would make it more believable that you aren't ignorant.

[–] toasteecup@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Thats a term that my gay community friends have told me is fine to use.

[–] Evkob@lemmy.ca 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

It's fine to use jokingly among friends, I do the same with my friend group. It's hardly appropriate for a serious conversation about discrimination with strangers.

[–] toasteecup@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Except I didn't ask them as a joke, I honestly asked "hey is it ok to use 'gay mafia' as a similar term for 'lgbtq+'?" and was told " yeah that's fine it sounds cool anyways"

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 10 months ago

And now other queer folk are telling you the opposite. So you stop using it on the people who don't like it, rather than arguing with them that they should like it because your friends do